The little girl didn't talk much.

Her chaotic childhood was filled with pain, the pain of sexual abuse
and moving back and forth between foster homes _ 11 total.

Writing and drawing were her only outlets to express herself and
communicate her pain.

Kristie Sams-Faulkner overcame the abuse and grew up to become a co-founder
of It's Our Little Secret, a Huntley-based organization that reaches out to children growing up like she did.

As Sams-Fulkner walked through the front doors of it's Our Little Secret's storefront offices recently, she picked up a backpack, called a "journey pack," nestled among dozens that will be distributed to foster children throughout McHenry County. She pulled out different items neatly tucked into the pockets and retrieved a journal.

"You want them to express what's going on," the Huntley woman said.

Sams-Faulkner and her partner, Maebelle Obispo-Emery, founded the organization a year ago to help empower children who have been abused or neglected and are now living in foster care. Like Sams-Faulkner, Obispo-Emery spent her childhood in foster care. Her father physically
abused her.

"We are trying to teach the children that yes, this abuse happened to you, but don't let it affect your life," Obispo-Emery said. "Both Kristie and I suffered abuse as children. As adults, we feel we have become successful."

"We have succeeded in not perpetuating the cycle," she said.

Obispo-Emery grew up in Chicago before her family moved to the suburbs. Due to the physical abuse, a CASA, or Court Appointed Special Advocate, was assigned to Obispo-Emery's case. A CASA representative helped her see that she could take charge of her own life.

 Likewise, two Department of Children and Family Services social workers gave Obispo-Emery hope by telling her not to despair about her family and not to let the situation hold her back, she said.

She was able to leave home at age 18. She later married, had three children and recently graduated from DePaul University in Chicago.

"My life has been wonderful since then," she said.

"People who have suffered that kind of trauma in some form or another suffer throughout childhood through the teenage years and into adulthood," Obispo-Emery said. "They fight those demons until they can fast it and see it has happened but they don't have to allow it to take over their life.

"I have seen a lot of people who dwell on it and I have met a lot of people who have allowed it to empower them," Obispo-Emery said.

Empowerment

Sams-Faulkner has been one of those who used it to empower herself. "I spent my whole life running from what they were," she said.

Her parents were both crank addicts, she said. Crank is similar to today's methamphetamine, she said. At one point, her mother became a prostitute to support her habit. Sams-Faulkner would be taken from the home whenever her parents relapsed or went to rehab. It would happen time and time again, she said.

Eventually, she was sent away to school where she graduated and went onto college. She married and has her own children.

The need to give back to the foster system runs deep for those who grew up in it and those who have been abused, she said. Many of the people who are part of IOLS have been abused and feel empowered to give back to children, she said.

"It's all about empowerment," Sams-Faulkner said. "You can empower others to empower themselves.

"Children growing up in foster care are "absolutely amazing," she said, adding they often grow up fast. "They just need that extra push to say you can do this," she said.

The organization

In the past year, IOLS started a $3.6 million capital campaign for a building. A
rendering has been completed and will be on display at the
organization's first anniversary event Friday.

The event will include a wine tasting from 6-9pm at the Talamore Community Clubhouse, 12121 Talamore Blvd.

The capital campaign also gained support from Disney, which donated $66,000 worth of public service announcements and there have been many donations for  the Journey Pack, she said.

Journey Packs have been distributed and the organization has launched a toy drive. IOLS also has been working on its programs. It has a mentoring program and therapeutic programs, like art and music therapy. A new program starting in the spring is called "God, Can You Hear Me?, with a faith-based curriculum to help restore a child's faith in God and humanity, according to its Web site. 

 "What we have achieved in 11 months is amazing," Sams-Faulkner said.

For information on IOLS's anniversary event, contact Sams-Faulkner at ksams@itsourlittlesecret.org.